“wow you look perfect are you really single? If you were my gf i would be honest, have integrity towards you, never cheat and be faithful, make you breakfast in bed, buy and make you dinner and lunch, and treat you like a queen like you deserve and i will give the best sex ever”
You know, I highly highly doubt all of the above. It may start off all fairy-tale like, but it rarely stays that way.. and that’s a lot of promises made over looks alone and minimal information.
The sad part is, really, that’s all a guy needs to ever do. For one month, if that, be just amazingly nice to a girl. Then, after that, no matter what he does, she will always think he will eventually go back to being the sweet loving gentleman he was when they first got together. Seriously. It happens all the time.
And what’s worse is that we girls know this.
We KNOW the guy we are dating is a huge tool. We see it too.. but he used to be so sweet. And we “know” that eventually he will go back to his old ways of being Prince Charming. And for those of you girls reading this who say you have never done that… I call bullshit. Or at the very least, I know you KNOW someone who is keeping some douchebag around because he used to be a super good guy.
You “nice guys” (and I hate that term..) out there see it too. Does “Her boyfriend’s an asshole.” sound familiar? She knows. But, he was a sweetheart like you once. You’ve managed to maintain a long time being sweet, certainly Asshole will go back to his roots.
I am guilty too, but ladies: we need to stop tolerating this. This is why we are destined to be divorced, or worse: CAT LADIES. If a guy stops doing nice things, and being amazing to you.. he’s got to go. …But.. easier said than done.. I get it.
Soon2BeCatLady 
The only thing I want to add to this is the SAME thing happens to dudes. The girl starts out for the first few weeks being totally cool with his poker buddies, is willing to provide sexual favors of the mouth-to-unit variety, doesn’t flip out if he doesn’t call for a day or two… And then poof-Super Needy Bitch Girl comes out of the woodwork. Until both men and women are able to start out a relationship being just as real as they plan on staying, relationships will end when the fairy tale ends. This is why things are pretty awesome with the guy I am with now-neither of us is perfect, and we sometimes annoy the hell out of each other, but none of it is a surprise. (we’ve been dating over a year, and we met on OKC)
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I think the strength to walk away from a shitty guy comes with experience. It can be very hard to do that. There are so many factors involved, it can be overwhelming to make a decision. But, yeah, I totally agree. If they are not on their best behavior, at least most if the time, you need to kick their ass to the curb. Life is too short to put up with shit from the person who is supposed to treasure you.
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Yep. Agree with the post and the comments above. I’m on a dating break right now (and DONE with the dating sites omg), but if I was trying and will, if I ever meet someone, be 100% honest about what I want so there’s no surprise. I had right on my profile that I expect daily communication for one thing. Anyway, it is hard to dump someone in an LTR because behavior changes gradually and goes back and forth. Just when you think, OK, that’s it, done, he’ll be nicer again for a month. You know things are never going to be quite as great as during the first few months, but you hope there will be some reasonable balance. When you finally see that the trend is steadily negative over time, then you need to make the decision.
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I agree with Velvet…100%. Happened to me a few times for sure.
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You think the girl/guy will “go back” to how they were when the relationship started because you’re living in denial. You’re not alone though. That’s what most of the people in our country do, about everything.
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Right.. it’s total denial.. but that’s just how our brains work.
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