The past few weeks I have been having some fun with a smartphone app called Tinder. If you aren’t aware of what it is – basically, it’s “Hot or Not” and if you “heart” someone, and they also “heart” you, you will be able to communicate with one another (text message style) through the app.
What I like about it is it’s also hooked up to your Facebook, so it will tell you if you have any mutual friends, or mutual interests. (Pro-tip: I always check out people who I have mutual friends with.. I will also get mad at said mutual friend for not offering to set me up.)
After signing up, and going through the endless amount of males that have this app- I heard a rumor that this is more of a hook-up app. I hadn’t really found that to be the case.. Until tonight:
“I want to bone you”
“Oh.. Umm, wow. Thanks, I guess?”
“Oh you are so welcome. Kinda creepy since my mom’s name is also [CatLady] but I could get over that”
“Okay, so.. what? Like, right now?”
“Hmm.. where do you live?”
“You definitely are not coming here… and you can take that whichever way you would like to.” (Ba-dum-bum! ..I crack myself up..)
“Sorry mom”
“You certainly know the way into a girl’s pants. Mom must be so proud.”
“You have a great rack”
“Yes, I’m aware.”
“May I see?”
“No.”
“No with a period? You mean business”
He then told me to have an enjoyable evening, and I wished him luck in his search for a piece of meat. He said he’d let me know of any updates. I shudder at the thought of this walking-STD.
Dammit, I don’t get anyone offering to do me! Just people who don’t reply to my pleasant, gentlemanly messages.
Maybe I need to start opening with “I want to bone you”… 🙂
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haha what an ass (him, not you)! I love the way you dealt with him. High five!
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The one thing I’ve noticed while browsing around on dating blogs (I love these kinds of stories) is that it doesn’t matter wether or not the creepers are 18, 30 or 50 years old. They’re all the same. Like some giant sex-obsessed illiterate hivemind, bent on subjugating our species.
Good luck being a woman on the net. It’s not the most friendly of places.
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Oh I am actually cracking up at this! I have some great stories too – I am currently going on 30 blind dates set up by 30 wannabe matchmakers. Check it out- http://www.mypotl.com – I think I am going to be a crazy handbag lady! xx
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I always enjoy coming to your blog. As for this article can you give me more hints? Thanks!
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What kind of hints? 🙂
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Thanks! I did not get the whole thing initially, but I have done some personal findings now.
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tinder oh what a laugh – it can be a source of extreme laughter with the girlfriends, to a bit of a self-esteem boost, through to the source of extreme cringe at some of the crazy openings lines men decide to use. Still it gives people the chance to approach a potential partner, that maybe in reality they would not have the courage to take…. whether that continues into the realm of reality… well only the brave will know 🙂
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I joined Tinder with moderately high hopes. I soon learned that it’s nothing more, or less, than a hook-up tool. One dude actually compared me to a McDonald’s burger. I wasn’t sure how to take that lol.
I hope your luck turns around!
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