“Your Mother Will LOVE Me!”

2 Nov

I’d advise being a little skeptical when a man’s dating profile says that he’s a gentleman more than once, and that your mother will love him.

“you look adorable.  iid love to talk sometime”

I don’t know why I bothered.

“About what?”

“anything,  you.. what you like to do for fun, etc  im curious  to know more”

Everyone knows by now that I HATE the “what do you like to do for fun?” question.  This was also sent at a bad time, so I did honestly forget to respond.. but, I wasn’t interested anyway.   He followed up a few days later with a question mark.

“I don’t really know how to respond to your inquiry.”

(Before you think this was a bitchy response, I do explain a bit later.)

“wow you are EXTREMELY strange, ill pass, ok thank you.  you need to get some communication help in how you talk to people, weirdest response Ive ever gotten.”

“Sorry.  Thank you for your helpful advice, I’ll take lessons.”

My response wasn’t intended to be snarky, for the record.  I knew my initial response wasn’t the greatest.

“try being friendly.. its not that hard”

“I’m quite sure you don’t know my tone, so you are making strong assumptions about my friendliness level.   — You’ve already established you aren’t interested, is there anything I can do for you?”

“not interested?  I WAS. but you blew me off, and were all dismissive.  You havent been very friendly.  its a fact not an insult”

“I could easily quote where you said you’d pass – saying you were no longer interested.  Once again, you don’t know me at all.  What you believe you have experienced is but a mere miscommunication.  I would have explained had I been asked instead of told that I don’t know how to communicate.  You chose to attack instead of ask for clarification.

Again, it seems as though we’ve established that we probably wouldn’t get along.  Is there anything I can do for you?”

“Not true.  Texts email etc don’t show tone”

“Yes, that has been my point.  You don’t know that I wasn’t being friendly;  I most certainly was.”

“Not really Its standoffish dismissive etc”

“I believe it was a lack of understanding.  Just as I have taken your messages to be attacking and abusive – that may not have been your intent, but that’s how I have chosen to take them.”

“You took it the way you did because your responses were strange.  I just wanted to know more and that = having an interest”

“Okay, but you asking for more is not specific.  I have 30 years of ‘me’ information stored away.  I don’t know what you want!  Do you want the whole story?  My favorite color?  The synopsis of my favorite book?!   — I don’t do well with general questions, and I’m sorry if that offends you.”

“Wow you sound psycho.  Im good best of luck”

“Thanks again for the criticism.”

“Youre bats****t crazy please don’t ever message me again”

(hehehehe… he doesn’t know how to spell batshit!)

“I’d advise correcting your profile on stating that you are a ‘gentleman’.   My mother would hate you.”

Before he blocked me, he messaged something along the lines of he was very nice to me, and that he politely asked me not to message him again.

I don’t know –  was I really in the wrong here?

7 Responses to ““Your Mother Will LOVE Me!””

  1. Kate November 3, 2015 at 3:40 am #

    Wow. For someone who’s not interested, he sure was interested. You have much more patience than I do.


  2. Elizabeth November 3, 2015 at 5:31 am #

    You weren’t wrong. He was a freak. I wish I could tell you that wasn’t normal… but I think it’s becoming the new normal.


  3. Peanut butter November 5, 2015 at 12:42 pm #

    I think if you look at both sides of this convo, the key was very bad communication, his tirade attack at the end was him saying, “I am only a gentlemen when I get my own way” his definition is not what is stored in 49 years of my brain, no matter how you read replies or find offensive a polite clarification or just a simple thanks for your time bye is the gentlemen thing to do. Calling someone a psycho demonstrates fears of oneself, you can think it but to all out say it just shows how insecure you really are. Cant say you did anything wrong I found your replies more jovial then rude.


    • Soon2BeCatLady November 5, 2015 at 12:58 pm #

      I definitely wasn’t sure how I was being psycho. 🙂


      • Peanut butter November 19, 2015 at 10:02 pm #

        I wasn’t implying that you were, the said comments referred to the excited gentleman who showed his true colours.


  4. Dave November 6, 2015 at 10:44 am #

    Clear case of snowball effect. As soon as he took the assumption you were being rude to him his ego was too big to admit he was wrong.


  5. Fee November 9, 2015 at 9:45 pm #

    It sounds like you need a break from the insipid conversations of online dating. I know, I’ve been there. These men ask stupid, bland, boring questions because they don’t know what else to say. They’re attracted, but they have nothing in common with you. You sense this on some level, but keep playing the game anyway, hoping something good will turn up. The deck is stacked against that possibility. Give internet dating a rest and try offline dating for a while. You may not meet a new man every week, but you won’t get disgusted nearly as fast.


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