Return of the Douchebag.

8 Mar

In case you have already forgotten about the tool I had the pleasure of dealing with just two short days ago, you can familiarize yourself here:

I think by not texting him, I put his ego through the blender.

“Hey Playa”

“You certainly know the way to a girl’s heart.”

“Not trying for your heart.  I don’t date players.  Only a player or someone desperate would go to speed dating.    Someone that wants to meet 30 people in 30 minutes either has her legs open non stop or is a player and not serious about a relationship.”

“If you say so.”

“I’m obviously u are trying to get as many dates and free meals as possible.  Have some class.  Meet one and get to know that person.”

Haha- how little he knows me..  (See:

“Actually quite the opposite.  I never allow anyone to pay my way.  Maybe you should ask questions and not assume.  I also think your logic is flawed.. if I was looking for a free meal, why didn’t I text you?  Or suggest we go have dinner?”

“Because you already met 30 people from speed dating.  They already had a train running on u”

Oh yeah… That’s why…

“I met 7 people at speed dating and don’t anticipate seeing any of those people again.  I guess that makes me a whore.”

“Well anyone that does speed dating is either a slut or desperate.  And you said you are not a slut so……”

“Again.. flawed logic.   But you have already said you aren’t interested, so can I help you?”

“I am interested you are sexy”

“And you think I would be interested after you have spent the entire day trying to offend me?  Oh… Riiiiiight… because I’m desperate.”

“Have u looked at my pics.  Yeah kind of hot”

Haha-  he totally isn’t… but that’s beside the point..

“I elect for the less attractive nice guy over the “kind of hot” douchebag any day.  But best of luck to you.”

“You are right.  I am not kind of hot.  I am scorching hot.  8 inch cock too.  You can have your average guy with small weiner.”

“Great, thanks!  Have a nice day.”

“I know and it’s curved.  You never have seen a monster like this.”


….And nor do I plan to….

7 Responses to “Return of the Douchebag.”

  1. Southern Lady March 8, 2012 at 12:40 am #

    You have GOT to be KIDDING me!?! Ugh! I realize there are a lot of GREAT men on this planet, but these idiots make it difficult to continue hoping to find one. LoL


  2. postmod March 8, 2012 at 3:52 am #

    Flawed logic is my weakness. Must resist urge to correct flawed logic. It usually only leads to more painfully flawed logic. Which only increases my need to correct it.


  3. columbuscynic March 8, 2012 at 4:04 am #

    The fact that he keeps coming back is amazing. Simply amazing.
    I guess being obnoxious is a hobby I haven’t heard of yet.


  4. M March 8, 2012 at 7:33 am #

    Objects in mirror may appear larger that they appear.


  5. Tazzy Monster March 8, 2012 at 12:35 pm #

    OMG how bloody annoying! Ugh what a dick clearly has no idea how to talk to women. You must have got a few laughs out of those messages lol!


  6. #31 March 8, 2012 at 2:03 pm #

    Your information is false. Of the 7 guys there, you still intend to hang out with me, for I am awesome.


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