Out-Witted

29 Jun

For those of you that got to hear my segment on Up And At “Em with Jack and Ben last week, you already know I received this as a first online dating message:

“Girl are you a tube of pillsbury cinnamon rolls because I want to bang you on the counter.”

I’ll give the guy this:  I laughed out loud..  loudly.

For those of you who I know are going to comment that I should date this guy…  I can’t.    The reasons are three-fold.

1)  He’s too young for me.

2)  He lives too far away.

and probably most importantly:

3)  He is way funnier than I am, and I am very distraught that I have been unable to craft an equally hilarious response.

 

 

 

7 Responses to “Out-Witted”

  1. Blossom Brouillard June 29, 2014 at 11:31 am #

    That’s a great line! But you underestimate your own wit.

    Like

    • christopherscott3 June 29, 2014 at 12:43 pm #

      I agree with the above; you under estimate your own wit and I have seen MANY clever comebacks from you but you here are a few things you could have said all from the Pillsbury product line: If you bang me on the counter I might scare you with my crescent rolls. Cinnamon rolls? No sir; I have sticky buns. After you bang me on the counter and I pop, will you glaze me? You should see my grands. If you bang me on the counter don’t forget your wiener wrap.

      Like

      • Soon2BeCatLady June 29, 2014 at 2:51 pm #

        I think it was more I couldn’t come up with anything that matches my personality. I would never say those things.

        Like

  2. Bonnielee & Siary (The La Femme Society) July 10, 2014 at 8:12 pm #

    Okay, we just laughed out loud – literally! We often wonder how crazy we would sound if we said things like that? Would the guy laugh? Would he think we are crazy? Or would he think we are just perfect. Dating is hard enough. Laughter definitely lightens the mood & makes someone more attractive but some people’s humor can border on creepy! Lol :p

    Like

  3. zebrawoman July 23, 2014 at 7:33 pm #

    If those dough things get too hot in a car, they explode. 😉

    Like

  4. Joe January 12, 2015 at 7:41 pm #

    This is funny and I did laugh, but in the end is it really any different in terms of what he’s asking for than all the crude guys you talk about on here with a much different tone? Why is the innuendo of the suggestion suddenly alright if it’s funny enough? I hope you take this comment as food for thought as it’s intended to be.

    Like

    • Soon2BeCatLady January 13, 2015 at 12:02 am #

      It’s no different – I just had many people (including the radio guys) tell me to date him.. so, just to stop those comments from coming in – I explained the issues.
      I would never date anyone who was that forward (even in jest) before meeting me in person.

      Like

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