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Groupons and Dating

20 Jan

Honestly, I hope a heated debate occurs in the comments on this question that I have.   (I have a feeling that at least some girls will have an issue with my stance on this..)

I have been asked over and over –   “Is it okay to use a Groupon on a first date?”   The topic has been brought up on my podcast a few times, and we can never come up with an answer that satisfies both @A_Dude79 and myself.   So –  I bring this question to you, loyal fans.  — And let’s make it “When is it okay to use a Groupon when you’re dating?”

As previously mentioned,   @A_Dude79 and I are split on the matter.   He says absolutely no way on a Groupon until a couple has slept together.    I’m a bit more lenient on the matter.

@A_Dude79 thinks that the first date is about making an impression, and paying for the date in full, without a coupon/groupon, shows that he is able to provide for the woman.   He argues that most Groupons you need to have printed out, or pull up on your phone – and that’s tacky.  (However,  he thinks if you can use a Groupon without having to present it, it’s fair game..  *Eyeroll.*  ..Men..)

I think a Groupon is just fine.  I would much rather be offered a fun activity that was purchased through Groupon than a boring coffee or dinner date any day of the week.  They often have really fun activities to try out at a discount.   We are also in a time of economic hardship –   I feel there is nothing wrong with saving some money.     And – if a girl is not okay with you saving a few dollars – do you want to be dating her anyway?   (I’ll throw in there that in a Soon2BeCatLady perfect world,  I would know about the Groupon before the date.)

So, interwebs  – Let’s vote, and (respectfully) duke it out in the comments.   I’m closing the poll after one week, so make sure to voice your opinion!

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Be Aggressive in Dating!!

13 Jan

If you aren’t tuning into my weekly podcast,  you are missing out.   Last week we discussed being aggressive in dating, and I wanted to re-cap as well as add a thought or two.

My sexy beast of a co-host, @A_Dude79, brought up that he read an article that suggests to males that instead of beating around the bush and asking a girl if she’d like to get coffee,  BE AGGRESSIVE and tell the girl you’d like to take her out on a date.   If she says yes, then there is no question whatsoever that it’s a date.   If she says no, then you’ve saved yourself some money.  At the very least everyone is on the same page.

I agree with this entirely.  Being aggressive shows that you know what you want, and you aren’t afraid to take a risk to get it.  It’s just manly to tell a girl you’d like to take her out on a date.   And –  most girls want to date a man.  — I know I do.

We discussed on the podcast that “Let’s get coffee sometime”  can be taken a number of different ways.   Now –  let me tell you this:   Most girls know that this means a date.  We just play stupid.  If we’re not interested in dating you, we’re likely to go to coffee anyway and make it a friend-date. (And I know how much you guys hate the friend-zone..)   You are more likely to get a straight answer on if a girl is interested in you if you are aggressive.

I digitally bumped into an old acquaintance of mine,  and sent a “hello” message over because I had already clicked his page.   (Because I remember everything and everyone, I assume everyone else does as well.)  We’ve chatted back and forth, but I have absolutely no interest in dating him.  He thinks it’d be fun to get coffee and catch up.

Will I go?  Sure.

Do I think it’s a date?  No.

Does he think it’s a date?   Probably.

Would I have said yes had he asked me out on a date?   No.  (Fun fact:  I am 99% sure that he doesn’t even remember my first name.)

So why would I go to coffee then?   Because coffee is casual and I like people.  Also, because I can’t guarantee he thinks it’s a date, maybe he does just want to catch up.   And, who knows –  even though I doubt it, there could be chemistry?

Guys- just be more forward with your intentions, and consider rejection as money and time saved.   Try it out and comment or tweet to me with how it went.   I have a feeling we will all be pleasantly surprised.

 

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An Online Dating Christmas Tale

26 Dec

Cat Lady and Crazy:

like Tequila and lime

(and I warn in advance that

this will be in rhyme)

 

Hope your Christmas was jolly

Now go grab a beer

As you read with delight

a tale of great “cheer.”

 

So….

 

Twas the evening of Christmas

as I sat all alone

No one to snuggle

No sweetheart to phone

 

No boyfriend from Santa

which was this year’s wish

Not even a message

on Plenty of Fish.

 

So I sat on the couch

to watch some T.V.

And wished for that boy

who was meant just for me.

 

“Oh well, that’s okay,

for I’m doing just fine.”

I said to myself

as I sipped on my wine.

 

But Hark!  What is this?

A message on ‘Cupid!

I thought to myself,

“Tis bound to be stupid!”

 

I wondered “Why me?”

Said “Your eyes played a factor.”

I thanked him.  He offered

“Want to ride on my tractor?”

 

I am fine alone

To me it doesn’t matter

Another year gone..

At least I’m not fatter!

 

Oh boy!  A new message!

How high I must rank!

But alas, he compared me

to a fruit he would spank.

 

I checked out my Quiver

One seemed quite the catch

But my name to his markings

was nary a match.

 

Oh boyfriend, come quick

For my loins be an itchin’

Okay – I’m just kidding

but ain’t these rhymes bitchin’?

 

Then Tinder did ping

as I swiped right my thumb

Twas a gentleman caller

looking for a three-some.

 

And then came a message

with atrocious grammar

I knew right away:

A Nigerian scammer.

 

Online dating is sketchy

and a pain in my ass!

But here’s to 2014

Let us all raise a glass!

 

So friends of my blog

Come back for the fun

And I wish you good luck

in your quest for “The One!”

 

(If you need some more rhymes

cuz face it – they’re bomb.

Check out my inspiration

at nerdtinkerer.com!)

Ex-Boyfriend Pain

16 Dec

I thought I was over him.  I seriously, truly, thought I was.  After all, it’s been nearly 3 years.

I should explain first that I picked up a seasonal job in a shopping mall, at a niche store.   Why?  For something to do, for a nice discount on a product that I spend way too much money on to begin with, and because they needed some help.

So, I was behind the counter, putting a few things away, and I saw him approach the store.. with a girl.   In a split second flat,  I felt like I had been kicked in the gut, and I was practically underneath the counter.   In reality, I probably wasn’t under there for more than 3 seconds,  but it was the longest 3 seconds ever, and a LOT went through my mind at that time.

The first thought I had was “Why are you upset about this?   You don’t know that this is a girlfriend.”  Followed by “Why is he here?  This mall is not even close to his house or work!”  “What am I going to say?”  “How am I going to hold myself together?”  “He is going to think I am a total loser since I am working here..  How am I going to explain this?”   (This one puzzles me, because I am not struggling financially, and am not ashamed of this job…  but – maybe I am?)   And, of course, lastly, “I can’t stay under here forever, or I will look like a huge moron.”

I took a deep breath, and rose from my hiding place.  I slapped on a big smile, and looked forward at the man who was now a foot inside my store.. who actually wasn’t my ex-boyfriend at all.   Just a similar built guy, with a similar winter coat and stupid hat as the ex-boyfriend.

I learned quite a lot in that 3 seconds..    the biggest lesson being that I don’t believe I’m quite over the ex yet.

Damn it.

 

One Way to Fix a Bad Tattoo..

4 Nov

I am not a tattoo kind of girl.  While I like the concept,  I don’t think there is anything that I could tattoo on myself that I’d be happy with even a couple years down the road.

I came across an online dating profile that made me giggle:

“I’m looking for a girl named “Julie”.. it’s just easier that way. I got this “Julie” tattoo last year, and would prefer to not deal with it. or if you want to change your name that’s cool.”

Well – that’s one way to “undo” a mistake, I guess.

VIP: Very Important Poll

10 Oct

Tonight,  @A_Dude79 gave some tips on “How to Win Guys Over” (in response to my “How to Win Girls Over”) on our podcast.   He had some excellent reminders for us girls, and I’d strongly suggest you take a listen. (The Podcast)

However,  one of his suggestions seemed a little off to me.   Keeping in mind that these tips are for people who have been on a few dates, he said “Be yourself.”   I countered that most people are on their best behavior at the beginning of a relationship.   He believes that people are only on their best behavior for the first few dates.  I believe that people are on their best behavior for much longer, maybe even so much as 6 months to a year.

We need you to help settle the score-  and A_Dude79 will share the results with he podsturbates next week Wednesday at 10:00pm Eastern Standard Time.

More Fun with Tinder

6 Oct

Although at this point, I certainly wouldn’t give it my endorsement for “Awesome way to get dates” – Tinder is a lot of fun, and I’ve come to expect pretty shady messages on there.

When I was visiting with some Twitter friends in the city that never sleeps, I decided to like everyone on Tinder.   Weeks later, I am still getting random “mutual matches” from the East Coast.

My favorite this week:

“A threesome you say??  I mean, you do seem nice enough, but awfully forward..”

I think you know me well enough by now that I really don’t think highly of people looking specifically for booty on dating websites or apps..  But, I also know that this guy has probably sent out this same message a hundred times before, and probably gets ignored or bitched at a lot.  And, certainly he isn’t likely to change his ways after getting a screen-ful from me.

“I apologize for being so forward.. Matt and Joe would really appreciate a third, though..”

“Haha. Best response ever!”

I’ve decided that whenever possible, I am going to just try to out-do the weirdos.   Tehehehe.  And, that was all I have heard from my Tinder friend..   I suppose the distance probably has the most to do with it, but I am going to make it my executive decision that I was just too funny for him.

You’re Doing It Wrong!!

3 Oct

Some of you may remember that earlier this year I had frequently made mention to the “Intern” I had.  She wasn’t actually an intern, but for lack of anything better to call her, that’s the name that stuck.

She, of course, has since moved on to bigger and better things than doing my grunt work – but was excited to talk to me about a boy she met online dating.  Much to my surprise, a day or so later – she told me that she was really nervous about meeting him and was going to cancel.

I told her that cancelling was not allowed, and “Just go have a drink.”   She then explained that he had set their first meetup to be at CHIPOTLE.   Really, dude?  Chipotle!?

I am absolutely not a fan of the first meetup including dinner of any sort, and believe you should stick to a drink – and appetizers IF it’s going well..  but – Gentlemen of the Interwebs:   Any sort of fast food chain is NOT acceptable for a first online dating meetup.   While I would consider Chipotle to be classier than White Castle,  I think “The Intern” said it best when she said “Nobody looks attractive eating a burrito.”

I would have cancelled, too.   Good call, Intern.

 

Hahaha… Oh Tinder.

18 Sep

The past few weeks I have been having some fun with a smartphone app called Tinder.  If you aren’t aware of what it is –  basically, it’s “Hot or Not” and if you “heart” someone, and they also “heart” you, you will be able to communicate with one another (text message style) through the app.

What I like about it is it’s also hooked up to your Facebook, so it will tell you if you have any mutual friends, or mutual interests.  (Pro-tip:  I always check out people who I have mutual friends with..   I will also get mad at said mutual friend for not offering to set me up.)

After signing up, and going through the endless amount of males that have this app-  I heard a rumor that this is more of a hook-up app.   I hadn’t really found that to be the case..   Until tonight:

“I want to bone you”

“Oh.. Umm, wow.  Thanks, I guess?”

“Oh you are so welcome.  Kinda creepy since my mom’s name is also [CatLady] but I could get over that”

“Okay, so.. what?  Like, right now?”

“Hmm.. where do you live?”

“You definitely are not coming here… and you can take that whichever way you would like to.”   (Ba-dum-bum!  ..I crack myself up..)

“Sorry mom”

“You certainly know the way into a girl’s pants.  Mom must be so proud.”

“You have a great rack”

“Yes, I’m aware.”

“May I see?”

“No.”

“No with a period?  You mean business”

He then told me to have an enjoyable evening, and I wished him luck in his search for a piece of meat.   He said he’d let me know of any updates.  I shudder at the thought of this walking-STD.

 

Flirting Techniques

17 Aug

On the last podcast,  we had a “flirting expert” on to discuss different ways to flirt.  And, I’ll be honest…  I define “flirting expert” as someone I may know in real life who is a huge flirt –  and he had some pretty cheesy pick-up lines to share.

He did also share that eye contact is good, not over-drinking, batting eyelashes and getting dolled up (i.e nails done, etc.)  are good tricks for girls to show that you are interested.

Honestly, I feel like I have those things down pat.. but perhaps just too much in my every-day life.  (I do consider myself a big flirt, in general.)   I thought I would bring it to discussion on the blog.    I’d like to know in the comments or via the Twitter –  What does someone of the opposite gender do that indicates to you that they like you, or are interested?  (I’m talking IN person.. not online.)

Additionally..  because the “flirting expert” mentioned to me that I should get my nails done, I have a poll question for my gentlemen readers:

But again –   let’s talk through this.   What can a person do to indicate that they are interested?   Can’t wait to see what you all think!!

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